Am I A Narcissist?
Welcome to the Narcissism!
Well, you need guts to read this because after reading this you may be asking yourself too, “Am I a narcissist?”.
I came across this word “Narcissism” a few years back and I searched the meaning. "Narcissism" means too much interest in and admiration for your own physical appearance and/or your own abilities. But only this sentence doesn't describe a narcissist personality completely, it's a way more than that.
There are some signs and habits which attribute to a narcissist personality. You aren't even knowing that you are doing something which makes you are a narc.
Are you always concerned about yourself? The way you look, what people say about you, your achievements, you want people to listen to your chatter which is all about you and pay attention to it- contributes to a narcissist personality. You want people to talk about yourselves but in an appreciable manner. You flaunt your achievements and tell about them again and again. When something good happens to you, you are happy but if something wrong happens to you, you feel like "why does it happen to me only?".
"I Know About It More"
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| Photo by Clem Onojeghuo on Unsplash |
Do you feel like you know more than others about the life-related things? When you pontificate about a thing and give unsolicited pieces of advice, then you have a narcissistic personality. If you feel like you don't behave like that, ask your friends and closed ones. Ask if they feel like you are too pompous or not. Remember it is good to give the right advice and be certain about your beliefs strongly but not accepting when you are wrong, makes you an opinionated person.
"I'm More Important Than Anything Else"
Do you feel annoyed or irritated if someone special or your friend gets late to respond to you? If you feel frustrated if someone gives reasons even if those are the valid one because the person is giving more attention to something else, then this is a trait of a narcissist. You may get busy sometimes and feel sorry if you miss your friend's party or an important meet. You'll try to make it up to them but if someone does the same, you may feel like you are less important. You will feel bad about it a lot.
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| Photo by Nathan McBride on Unsplash |
Do you feel annoyed or irritated if someone special or your friend gets late to respond to you? If you feel frustrated if someone gives reasons even if those are the valid one because the person is giving more attention to something else, then this is a trait of a narcissist. You may get busy sometimes and feel sorry if you miss your friend's party or an important meet. You'll try to make it up to them but if someone does the same, you may feel like you are less important. You will feel bad about it a lot.
"East Or West, I'm The Best"
Do you want to ace in every field you opted for? If you are afraid to be called a loser, you have a narcissist personality. This is a quite surprising one because it seems to help them achieve so much but it has a bad side too because they end up creating chaos. Focussing on so many things at the same time is difficult, especially when you want to be in a win-win situation. You want to be rich, powerful and you can't compromise anything for that.
Read this: Narcissists 'irritating but successful'
"I'm Attractive And I Know It"
Do you feel anxious if you do a lot to look charming and people don't praise you for it? If you like self-maintenance and you are so much into it, then it's a characteristic of a narcissist personality. You want to go out with people, but you take a lot of time to get ready. You want people to appreciate you and if they don't, you will try to express it directly or indirectly. You can not take criticism. No, not even for a moment. You encourage your loved ones and friends to be attractive and compliments them too. But if somebody tells you even a small fault or criticize you, you feel hurt.
"I'm lonely"
Do you feel lonely more than often? If you start feeling lonely and left out after an argument with your loved ones and whatever they do to make it up to you, you are not ready to be alright- you are a narcissistic personality. Your partner's love and care can not heal you and you just want to go away to new people to find happiness and love to treat you. No matter how hard your loved ones try, they can not make you feel better until and unless you start to calm down on your own. Initially, you feel lonely with them too and try to push them away but soon you realize that you are nothing without them, so you start going back to them.
"Am I Wrong?"
Do you refuse to admit when you're wrong during an argument? Even if you realise you have done wrong but you feel hard to accept it, you have a narcissistic personality. Sometimes, when things go wrong between you and your loved ones and it's their fault, you feel annoyed. You start getting mad at them. Even if they realise their mistakes and apologize to you, you may forgive them but you can't become normal easily. And if it's your fault, you can't admit it easily and keep on blaming the other person for the problems you are facing.
"I'm Hurt So I Will Hurt You Back"
Do you feel like hurting a person back if he/she hurts you? If you start telling them how much you are hurt and hurt them back saying that's how it feels like, this is a trait of a narcissist personality. You start throwing a tantrum without even listening to the other person. You criticize or abuse them for doing wrong to you, even if it's unintentional. It takes a lot of time for you to recover and generally you don't forget that incident. You bring it back in the next argument. But you don't like it if the other person does the same to you.
"Should I Take My Own Life?"
Do you ever have this question in your mind that you should commit a suicide or not? If, sometimes, you feel like you should kill yourself because nobody loves you. But, at the other times, you feel like if you will die, then nobody will even care and will move on, this is a characteristic of a narcissist personality. You get so hurt sometimes that you want to take your own life. You want people to know your importance when you're gone. You feel sceptical about the people of the world. You feel cheated, even if the other person doesn't intentionally hurt you. But, sometimes, you feel that you don't want to commit suicide because you will fade into oblivion. Suddenly, you start feeling that you can't afford to lose your life for some shitty people who have made your life difficult.
"Altruism Isn't In My Blood"
Do you like to do things for other people's sake even if it brings disadvantage for yourself? If you try to do things for people and fail to do so because it will bring no advantage for you, it is a characteristic of a narcissistic personality. You want to help people just to show you are generous but think of your advantage too. If you have to do something for someone sacrificing your own happiness and it brings disadvantage to you, you are not ready to do it.
"I Can't Even Think About A Single Good Thing"
Do you feel so bad after an argument that you lose your positivity? If you can't even think about one good thing after an argument and you feel like everything is wrong, then it is a characteristic of a narcissistic personality. It is one of the attributes of a narcissist that makes him/her feel bad about himself/herself too. You are mad at someone so much that you do not want to remember a single beautiful moment of you two. Whether you or the other person is faulty, you let every good thing goes in vain. Even if you have somewhere in your mind that you and the other person always have a good time together, you deny it as the argument is on your mind.
"Everyone Tries To Control Me"
Do you feel like people are trying to control you? If you feel too much vulnerable in front of others, it is a characteristic of a narcissistic personality. It is difficult for you to follow people's advice as you think they are trying to control you. You feel it hard to listen to people when they try to tell you their problems.
Quiz
Play this quiz to know how narcissistic are you!
Conclusion
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| Photo by Matheus Ferrero on Unsplash |
Do you want to ace in every field you opted for? If you are afraid to be called a loser, you have a narcissist personality. This is a quite surprising one because it seems to help them achieve so much but it has a bad side too because they end up creating chaos. Focussing on so many things at the same time is difficult, especially when you want to be in a win-win situation. You want to be rich, powerful and you can't compromise anything for that.
Read this: Narcissists 'irritating but successful'
"I'm Attractive And I Know It"
 |
| Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash |
Do you feel anxious if you do a lot to look charming and people don't praise you for it? If you like self-maintenance and you are so much into it, then it's a characteristic of a narcissist personality. You want to go out with people, but you take a lot of time to get ready. You want people to appreciate you and if they don't, you will try to express it directly or indirectly. You can not take criticism. No, not even for a moment. You encourage your loved ones and friends to be attractive and compliments them too. But if somebody tells you even a small fault or criticize you, you feel hurt.
"I'm lonely"
 |
| Photo by Ben White on Unsplash |
Do you feel lonely more than often? If you start feeling lonely and left out after an argument with your loved ones and whatever they do to make it up to you, you are not ready to be alright- you are a narcissistic personality. Your partner's love and care can not heal you and you just want to go away to new people to find happiness and love to treat you. No matter how hard your loved ones try, they can not make you feel better until and unless you start to calm down on your own. Initially, you feel lonely with them too and try to push them away but soon you realize that you are nothing without them, so you start going back to them.
"Am I Wrong?"
 |
| Photo by Isaiah Rustad on Unsplash |
Do you refuse to admit when you're wrong during an argument? Even if you realise you have done wrong but you feel hard to accept it, you have a narcissistic personality. Sometimes, when things go wrong between you and your loved ones and it's their fault, you feel annoyed. You start getting mad at them. Even if they realise their mistakes and apologize to you, you may forgive them but you can't become normal easily. And if it's your fault, you can't admit it easily and keep on blaming the other person for the problems you are facing.
"I'm Hurt So I Will Hurt You Back"
 |
| Photo by Cristian Newman on Unsplash |
Do you feel like hurting a person back if he/she hurts you? If you start telling them how much you are hurt and hurt them back saying that's how it feels like, this is a trait of a narcissist personality. You start throwing a tantrum without even listening to the other person. You criticize or abuse them for doing wrong to you, even if it's unintentional. It takes a lot of time for you to recover and generally you don't forget that incident. You bring it back in the next argument. But you don't like it if the other person does the same to you.
"Should I Take My Own Life?"
 |
| Photo by Eva Blue on Unsplash |
Do you ever have this question in your mind that you should commit a suicide or not? If, sometimes, you feel like you should kill yourself because nobody loves you. But, at the other times, you feel like if you will die, then nobody will even care and will move on, this is a characteristic of a narcissist personality. You get so hurt sometimes that you want to take your own life. You want people to know your importance when you're gone. You feel sceptical about the people of the world. You feel cheated, even if the other person doesn't intentionally hurt you. But, sometimes, you feel that you don't want to commit suicide because you will fade into oblivion. Suddenly, you start feeling that you can't afford to lose your life for some shitty people who have made your life difficult.
"Altruism Isn't In My Blood"
 |
| Photo by J W on Unsplash |
Do you like to do things for other people's sake even if it brings disadvantage for yourself? If you try to do things for people and fail to do so because it will bring no advantage for you, it is a characteristic of a narcissistic personality. You want to help people just to show you are generous but think of your advantage too. If you have to do something for someone sacrificing your own happiness and it brings disadvantage to you, you are not ready to do it.
"I Can't Even Think About A Single Good Thing"
 |
| Photo by nikko macaspac on Unsplash |
Do you feel so bad after an argument that you lose your positivity? If you can't even think about one good thing after an argument and you feel like everything is wrong, then it is a characteristic of a narcissistic personality. It is one of the attributes of a narcissist that makes him/her feel bad about himself/herself too. You are mad at someone so much that you do not want to remember a single beautiful moment of you two. Whether you or the other person is faulty, you let every good thing goes in vain. Even if you have somewhere in your mind that you and the other person always have a good time together, you deny it as the argument is on your mind.
"Everyone Tries To Control Me"
 |
| Photo by niu niu on Unsplash |
Do you feel like people are trying to control you? If you feel too much vulnerable in front of others, it is a characteristic of a narcissistic personality. It is difficult for you to follow people's advice as you think they are trying to control you. You feel it hard to listen to people when they try to tell you their problems.
Quiz
Play this quiz to know how narcissistic are you!
Narcissistic Personality Quiz
Conclusion
Narcissism is not your nature, it is your habit and a habit can be changed. You can be a better person. You'll find ways to get out of this. Don't let narcissism overpower you. It will destroy you, and take your loved ones away from you. Everyone needs to be a narcissist in some situations as it can make you successful. You need narcissism in your life at few points but without compromising your friends, relations and your loved ones.
Hello, this comment is unrelated, but it was the only way I could reach you! I read your article on Neruda's food poems and I wanted to offer a correction. In the Ode to Salt, when he talks about the salt singing, I beleive he is describing wind in the desolation of the great salt flats of his homeland in Chile, not a mine or a cave. They are both called salares, which is where the translation confuses most readers. I know it is a minor issue, but I have studied Neruda quite a bit and have seen this mine analysis in many places. Otherwise, I loved your article very much! Thank you.
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